A Message of Support
Updated 11/29/18 to include memorial details.
It is with great sadness that The Crossover shares the death of first-year student, Nova McGarry. Nova was from Pearl River, New York, and was studying within the Information Technology & Sciences Division. They loved Champlain, and had close relationships with professors and peers on campus.
Angela Batista, Vice President of Student Affairs, shared the news with students, faculty, and staff on November 26th. According to Batista’s email, Nova died as a result of suicide over the Thanksgiving Break.
The Crossover team wants to reiterate that counseling services are available to everyone 24/7. Students can reach the Champlain College helpline by calling (802) 865-5745 or the Howard Center Crisis Line at (802) 488-7777. Counselors are also available in Skiff Hall. For this week, The Counseling Center will be offering drop-in sessions from 9 am to 4 pm all week.
Champlain is a small community, and there are people here who care. Oftentimes, the things we face in life can seem daunting and unmanageable, but reaching out for help is not a sign of weakness or surrender. The Crossover team encourages all students to reach out to friends and family when needed, and to never be afraid to ask for support.
A celebration of life and candlelight vigil will be held in Nova’s honor on Monday, December 3, 2018 from 4-5pm. It will be held in Fireside Lounge.
Our heartfelt sympathies go out to Nova’s family and to everyone who is grieving the loss of such a bright and wonderful member of the Champlain community.
Ember Nova Quinn • Nov 13, 2023 at 9:02 AM
Hi Nova. It’s me again. I’m reading at a banned book event in Milton VT on Wednesday. I’ll be reading from Maia Kobabe’s book “Gender Queer: a memoir”.
They want me to speak for a few minutes also, after I read, about what the book means to me. It’s a terrific graphic novel, for sure, and the most widely banned book of 2023 . Mostly, I’m trying to decide whether to mention you. It’s difficult to not think about you, this time of year especially, but with your bame as my middle name, I honestly think about you most of the time.
Sometimes I imagine what it would be like to live my life without this self-imposed mission to raise nonbinary awareness and fight for transgender, queer, nonbinary rights. I imagine someday waking up each morning, safe and happy and stress-free–walking and visiting trees and bugs and animals–making art and having wonderful conversations with queer friends. I actually do those things, so I’m not complaining, but I’m also aware of the erasure of oeopke like me–and I LOVE people like me! I can’t just turn my back on the struggle, even if life allowed me to do so.
I’m running for Milton Town Select Board next year. If I win I will be the first openly nonbinary Select Board member Milton VT has ever had. Milton is an angry town. Lots of poor, working class people who have been ignored for so long that they got swept up into Trumpism–hating anything and anyone different–hating change. It’s sad. A group called VPACT(Vermont Parents Against Critical Theory) are fighting DEI initiatives everywhere, from schools to town government. They need to be stopped. I honestly believe I have an opportunity to do that by winning a seat on the Board and showing everyone that I’m intelligent and kind and caring.
Oh hey! Side note: I was diagnosed Autistic this year. I know, shocking right, I’m glad though. It helps me understand myself more and forgive myself for doubting myself all those years.
I also got THEY/THEM tattooed on my knuckles! It’s so wonderfully badass! I really like it
So maybe I’ll mention you. I miss you. This past August I was invited to the birthday party for the nonbinary kid I had been mentoring for a few years. I convinced them to visit a teen drop in center and they met 5 other nonbinary kids and now they have lots of friends Their 21st birthday was wonderful! I sat with these 6 18 to 21 year old nuerodivergent nonbinary kids on a beach by the lake and we ate cherry pie and roasted fresh corn and sang songs and talked about the universe. I don’t see my young nonbinary friend anymore, because they have friends and a life now. I’m sad, but I’m WAY more happy too. I’m happy for them. You’d love them all! I know it. I do.
December 8th will be my 5 year enbyversary and, unfortunately, the 5th anniversary of you being gone. You’ll always be part of me, though, and that makes me very happy
Bye for now,
Ember
Ember Nova Quinn • Jan 10, 2023 at 12:57 PM
So, here I am again. I’m speaking at a Milton VT school board meeting tomorrow. Our district is trying to adopt an equity and diversity policy that recognizes and supports trans and nonbinary students and a lot of people in town are against it and are trying to shut it down.
I’m going to talk about you, I hope that’s okay. I want them to know that their attitudes and policies hurt us. I’m so tired of this town, but I know there are trans and nonbinary student herewho needme.
On a bright note, I started working weekends at a youth homeless shelter and half the kiddos are nonbinary. It’s such a delight! A few of my workmates are nonbinary also.
Anyway, I cannot help but think of you. I hope someday this will be a world that we can live in without struggling every single day.
Ember Nova Quinn • Aug 19, 2020 at 12:05 PM
Hi Nova. I wanted to tell you that I filed for my legal name change yesterday and I chose your name as my middle name–I hope that’s okay.
I’ve checked around for folx who may have known you at Champlain and haven’t been able to find any of your friends–they probably don’t want me bothering them anyway. From what I could find out, it doesn’t seem that your given Family even knows that you’re trans. That’s sad.
I’ve probably told you before, but you are the reason I finally came out. I felt SO guilty for letting you and other young trans folx down for all these years by being to afraid to be myself. Since I came out less than two years ago, two trans youth have sought me out and I get to mentor them. It makes me happy, but it also emphasizes the fact that I let a LOT of trans kids down when I was closeted
I never knew you but I will never forget you. I will carry your name and I will remind the world that you existed.
I’m running for State Representative from Milton, VT this year. I am planning on winning, too. I’m going to push for LGBTQIA+ Curriculum in all public schools so that someday no one will have to be afraid to come out because we and everyone else will know that it’s perfectly natural to be trans.
I wonder if anyone will ever read this. If someone does, and you really knew Nova, I would be happy to talk to you❤️ [email protected]
Nova, I’m not a religious person, but if you read this somehow, I want you to know that I love you and I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.
Love always,
Ember
Ember Quinn • Jun 12, 2020 at 10:34 PM
I’m not sure how many people I’ve told this story to, but ***T/W for mention of suicide…
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As many of you know, I came out transgender on December 8 2018. I knew I was transgender for a couple years before that, but I was afraid of what my partner and kids would think and especially the backlash they would face from having a transgender spouse and parent.
I was approaching 50 years old–I had quit drinking the year before and lost a LOT of weight and went vegan the year prior to that. I wasn’t happy, though. I was seeking mental health counseling for the first time in my life but I wasn’t able to articulate to my doctor just how badly I needed it.
I was steeped in trans and non-binary information for more than two years and I had been living on Twitter as a non-binary femme for over a year as my only outlet. I had almost told my partner 5 or 6 times but was too scared . I spent many nights working 3rd shift alone doing janitorial work and stayed up until daybreak almost each other day enjoying the solitude and the JOY OF NOT HAVING TO PRETEND TO BE SOMEONE I WASN’T. I was sadly resigned to NEVER come out
That all changed on November 28 2018 when I was on my way to drop off something to our oldest child at Champlain College and I heard a brief news article on VPR about a first year student at Champlain College that had committed suicide over Thanksgiving break. I noticed immediately, having been steeped in trans/non-binary world online, that the reporter used NO PRONOUNS and the student’s name was “Nova”. Even though the reporter did not say it, I KNEW that Nova was transgender. It was confirmed by my kid because, though he didn’t know Nova, he had friends in the LGBTQIA community at school who knew them
The next week was really hard for me. I felt partially responsible for Nova’s death. I felt really guilty for hiding my true self from the world, and by association, from Nova themself.
I felt that if I had been out and if Nova had seen me walking down the street, like it was the most normal thing in the world, that maybe they would have been able to find the strength to fight for life a little longer.
It might sound like I was being unreasonably hard on myself. I never met Nova. I don’t even know what they looked like or literally anything else about them. Their obituary deadnamed and misgendered them
I came out for Nova as well as to save my own life–which was on borrowed time by then. I didn’t realize how happy I would be–living my life how I want and being loved and accepted by my partner and my family. The happiness I have is a happiness that Nova never got to experience and I feel guilty for being this happy, honestly.
I could live forever cooking and cleaning for my loving family and snapping selfies and food pics for you beautiful people and let the rest of the world go by and be perfectly happy if it wasn’t for the knowledge that I would be letting Nova, a trans/non-binary 19 year old who I never met, down. I am atheist and I don’t really even believe in the common idea of an afterlife, but I feel bound to serve Nova for the rest of my life.
I will not just NOT hide, but I will do everything I can to be SEEN. I will walk the busier streets, I will longer in public, I will talk to the press at every opportunity, I will be seen in the schools and I will act like I BELONG there. Because I DO. WE ALL DO. Nova didn’t feel like they belonged. And I can’t bring them back, but I will do ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING I CAN to make sure that every trans kid, every queer kid, every lesbian kid, every gay, aro, poly, non-binary, ace and more kid has a chance to see someone like me and that it maybe just gives them enough strength to get them out of a bad place for long enough to live another day. It’s an impossible job, I know, but I’ve got forever.
Thank you Nova McGarry. I never met you but you gave my life purpose and I promise EVERYONE. RIGHT. NOW. I will never give up. I’ll always remember you❤️